Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when golfing?

In case they get a hole in one!

Why do seagulls fly over the ocean?

Because if they flew over the bay, we'd call them bagels.

What do you call a poor Santa Claus?

St. Nickel-less.

What would the Terminator be called in his retirement?

The Ex-terminator

Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.